Hazelnut Spread

This recipe only has five ingredients.  

Hazelnuts (roasted and blanched) very finely chopped*

sugar

sour cream

cream cheese

vanilla

Put 8 oz cream cheese in a mixer with three good blops (roughly 1 tablespoon, I think- I never use a recipe when making it myself) of sour cream and get a mixin.  It helps if the cream cheese is nice and soft before you start.  Add about 3 tablespoons of sugar (again, just an approximation) to this mix and continue blending.  

Add ~3 tablespoons of the chopped hazelnuts to the mix, as well as a splash of vanilla.  Beat that stuff until it's fairly fluffy, then spread on a nice bagel (I put it on cinnamon minibagels from Winco, toasted) and enjoy. 

All of the proportions are approximate, I'm sorry, but this is a recipe where it's really all a matter of personal taste.  It's not like bread where if you add too much water it becomes unworkable glue- it's really a very safe recipe.

But it can be a little complicated.

It's the hazelnuts.  They're the problem.  

You can get blanched hazelnuts at some stores, but if you don't have a store that carries them, then you have to blanch them yourself.  I had to figure this out trying to follow advice from the internet (always a bad idea**) and it took many attempts, but I think I've got the technique down now. 

Get some hazelnuts from a store.  I go to Winco, because they've got the best prices in town, but Safeway and Top Foods also carry them in the bulk section. 

On the stove, boil a couple cups of water in a small pot.  Let it get way boiling before you continue. 

Add the hazelnuts, taking out any that are chopped in half or have way exposed patches***.  

Stir the pot at regular intervals. 

Let them boil for 3 minutes.  Then, turn off the stove, drain the water, and put the hazelnuts in a bowl.  

Some people say that you can get the skin off by rubbing them with your fingers, or a dishtowel, but I always find it easier (though uggy for your fingernails) to just try to pick it off.  You may have to scratch at it, but you'll soon pick up the technique for getting the skin off. 

After they're all peeled, put them on a baking sheet and put that baking sheet into a cold oven.  

Turn the oven to 350 degrees and set the time for 10 minutes. At 10 minutes, they may not be completely dry, but you should keep a hawklike eye on them once they've been in longer than that.  You do NOT want them to burn.  

When they're dry, they will

1.  not look so wet

2.  feel more solid (like wood, I guess, versus a pencil eraser?) 

3.  be ready to food process.

 This process is long- saturday is the best day to do it- but the rewards are blanched hazelnuts!

YAY

*Put them in a food processor until it cannot possibly be described as chunky. But of course, this depends on personal taste.  Some people might want chunkier spread.  

**Unless it's my advice, and then FOLLOW IT TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH.

*** They get waterlogged if you try to boil them, and give your spread a weird, crunchily wet taste.  Like some kind of freaky salad.  It's fine- you can just add them as they are to the rest of the spread.  A little skin won't kill you.